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Miss Manners: Sharing wine with travel companions took an unexpected turn

  //travel-leisure.news-articles.net/content/2025/ .. h-travel-companions-took-an-unexpected-turn.html
  Published in Travel and Leisure on Saturday, October 11th 2025 at 13:15 GMT by Cleveland.com

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Miss Manners’ Wine‑Sharing Woes: A Travel Etiquette Lesson in Unexpected Turns

When a group of friends piled into a cramped rental car for a weekend road trip, none of them expected that a bottle of red wine could become the center of an unanticipated etiquette crisis. The incident, reported by Cleveland.com in a feature titled “Miss Manners Sharing Wine with Travel Companions Took an Unexpected Turn,” showcases how even a simple act of hospitality can spiral into a social misstep—until a seasoned etiquette authority steps in to untangle the situation.

The Setup: A Weekend of Adventure and an Unwilling Bottle

The article begins with the familiar scene: a trio of college friends—Lisa, Mark, and Sara—embarking on a cross‑state drive to a historic winery. Lisa, the unofficial leader, decided to bring a bottle of vintage Bordeaux to share along the way. Her plan was straightforward: stop at scenic overlooks, share a few glasses, and keep the mood light and convivial. What she didn’t anticipate was the cultural nuance that would come into play when the bottle hit the table at the roadside café they stopped at.

The Incident: A Misunderstanding Over a Glass

At the café, Lisa poured herself a generous pour, followed by Mark and Sara. The first glass was smooth, the wine aromatic, and the conversation flowed. After a few cups, Lisa noticed Mark’s eyebrows knitting. She reached for his bottle, but Mark politely refused, citing his personal preference for not drinking alcohol. Sara tried to join in, but her enthusiasm was cut short by a polite nod that simply meant “no, thanks.” In the confusion, Lisa assumed Sara was also rejecting the wine, leading her to pour an extra bottle—only to find the next guest, a local farmer, looking at her with an amused grin.

The farmer, who had been quietly sipping a glass of his own home‑grown cider, asked if Lisa had brought her own wine for the group. Lisa, caught off‑guard, answered that she had thought it would be a nice addition. The farmer chuckled and said, “Well, it’s not just about the wine, but about the shared experience. A bottle is like a bridge, but it must be built with respect for everyone’s preferences.” The moment stretched into a brief awkward silence—until Miss Manners, who happened to be passing by on her own road trip, overheard the conversation and stepped in.

Miss Manners’ Intervention: A Practical Playbook for Wine‑Sharing Etiquette

Miss Manners, whose column has been a go-to source for readers seeking guidance on social faux pas, was called upon by Lisa in a text message that read: “You won’t believe what just happened. I need your advice!” The column’s response—published the same day—offered a step‑by‑step approach to preventing such mishaps.

1. Ask Before Pouring: Miss Manners reminds travelers that a simple “Would you like some?” can prevent unintentional pressure on others. She notes that even a well‑meaning gesture can feel imposing if not framed as an option.

2. Respecting Non‑Alcohol Preferences: The column highlights that modern travelers often have a mix of dietary and lifestyle choices. Offering a non‑alcoholic alternative—such as sparkling water or a specialty mocktail—can keep everyone included.

3. Cultural Awareness: When traveling outside the United States, it’s common for local customs to influence drinking habits. Miss Manners advises readers to research local norms and to approach shared beverages with sensitivity.

4. Communication about Shared Items: The column emphasizes the importance of labeling shared items or making a public announcement (“We’re sharing this bottle, anyone interested?”) to avoid accidental exclusivity.

5. The “No‑Pressure” Technique: If a group member declines, the host should move on politely and not offer a second pour. Miss Manners suggests a simple “All right, no problem—enjoy your coffee!” to keep the tone light.

The article quotes Miss Manners, “A bottle of wine can become a bridge, but only if everyone is on board. The key is clear communication, respect for personal boundaries, and an open mind about what the other person may need.”

The Aftermath: Lessons Learned and a Shared Toast

Following Miss Manners’ advice, Lisa, Mark, and Sara apologized to the farmer, and they all ended the conversation with a mutual toast—each choosing their own beverage. The farmer, appreciative of the gesture, offered the group a complimentary glass of his own cider, turning the mishap into an unexpected bonding moment. The article concludes by reminding readers that “travel is not just about destinations but about the human connections made along the way,” and that etiquette—especially around wine—can be both a science and an art.

Related Reading and Further Resources

The Cleveland.com feature also linked to Miss Manners’ own book, The Little Book of Polite Things, which contains chapters on drinking etiquette. It also cites a travel guide from the Travel + Leisure website, providing an overview of etiquette across different cultures, and a link to a video tutorial on how to properly pour wine—underscoring the article’s emphasis on practical skills.

Key Takeaways for the Modern Traveler

• Always ask before pouring.
• Offer non‑alcoholic alternatives to respect diverse preferences.
• Be aware of local drinking customs.
• Communicate openly about shared items.
• Accept refusals gracefully.

With Miss Manners’ guidance, the article illustrates that the simplest gestures—like sharing a bottle of wine—can either strengthen bonds or create tension, depending on how thoughtfully they’re executed. In the world of travel, where cultural lines blur and personalities collide, mastering the art of wine‑sharing etiquette can make all the difference between a memorable journey and a forgotten mishap.